Christian views dating relationships

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When it comes to making up, don’t misunderstand me.

It’s such a common thing that either you’ve heard of it or are caught up in it yourself! It is the seemingly endless habit many couples have in which they will fight and makeup on a regular basis. It makes for great movies, but what works for a 90-minute Hollywood hit is a no-go in the real world.

This involves judging a potential guy or girl for the 38 qualities you are looking for in an ideal mate—before even grabbing coffee together. Sometimes the “hanging out” leads to hooking up, sans dating, which is another uber-confusing side effect of the Faux Christian Dating cycle. What if Christians just began to date like normal people—not dating toward immediate marriage and not eschewing dating for the less-desirable “hanging out” no man’s land?

It’s like arranged marriages where no one is making the arrangements, and it doesn’t seem to work very well. Here’s what I think it would require: Stop evaluating whether the guy who’s taken an interest in you is strong and tenderhearted enough to raise your future kids.

I can’t say it clearly enough: Hanging out in groups will not be enough information to determine who is worth marrying.

Everyone is different when you get them one-on-one.

If you feel convicted of certain behaviors, stop doing them.

It’s perfectly healthy to forgive, but it’s not OK to be unwise.

“Do you think Christian girls make dating too serious? “I need a buffer of at least five dates before I’m thinking of any future at all! What if you completely jettison the idea of finding your husband or wife via dating, at least for the first five dates?

Most of marriage involves time together, one on one, in a friendship.

And spending intentional one-on-one time—not too serious, just time—allows both parties to experience what it would be like to continue in the relationship.

What if dating is about getting to know someone and gauging interest, not lifelong compatibility?

The great thing about changing expectations is that it lowers the pressure on grabbing dinner together and figuring out if the two of you even like talking to one another!

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